How to Get Any Man To Love and Cherish You? Dating and Relationship Advice.

 

All mistakes in our personal relationships have already been made by millions of other people over the course of our history. And we can either go ahead through life and make the very same mistakes and lose part of potential happiness, or we can learn from others about what works well and employ that advice to make life way better. And this is what this course is about. Here is how it can help you: 

20 People on the Best Relationship Advice They Ever Received

Among the ups, the downs, the way, way ups, and the oh-no-do-we-need-to-break-up downs, it’s no secret that relationships are tough. But the sweet reward of being loved and getting to love someone in return is what inspires all of us to navigate these choppy waters. Sometimes, though, we need help figuring it out. We asked the Cut’s readers to anonymously share the best relationship advice they’ve ever received. Below, their pearls of wisdom.

1. My mom, who has been with my father for 47 years, once said to me: “I’m not always in love with your father, but I always love him. And I’m always surprised when I fall back in love with him.” I’ve been with my husband for 12 years. Because of my mom’s advice, I don’t panic when we’re going through a tough time; I look forward to falling in love with my husband again. And that moment is usually not sexy, like when one of our kids vomits in the middle of the night and he gets up to help me clean it up and then touches my foot with his foot when we finally climb back into bed. That’s love.

2. That I cannot choose to prioritize the desires, whims, or life choices of a significant other at the expense of losing my sense of self. If I become the best version of who my partner wants me to be (or who I think he wants me to be), I’m camouflaging all those wonderful parts of me that exist with or without that person.

3. When you get married, make sure the person you choose is someone you’d not only want to marry but also to divorce. For me, it highlights the importance of choosing someone who is gentle, caring, and good-hearted not only in the good times but also in the bad times.

4. A good friend once told me that you have to “fit your own oxygen mask first.” I was in a really bad place with depression and anxiety and trying to make a relationship work that was never going to work, fixing all of his issues and neglecting my own. It was the most intense wake-up-call piece of advice I’ve ever received, and I now repeat it like a parrot to anyone asking for advice. You can’t help anyone else until your own oxygen mask is firmly fitted.

Read more on https://www.thecut.com/article/the-best-dating-and-relationship-advice.html

History of Dating:

Dating as an institution is a relatively recent phenomenon which has mainly emerged in the last few centuries. From the standpoint of anthropology and sociology, dating is linked with other institutions such as marriage and the family which have also been changing rapidly and which have been subject to many forces, including advances in technology and medicine. As humans societies have evolved from hunter-gatherers into civilized societies, there have been substantial changes in relations between people, with perhaps one of a few remaining biological constants being that both adult women and men must have sexual intercourse for human procreation to happen.

Humans have been compared to other species in terms of sexual behavior. Neurobiologist Robert Sapolsky constructed a reproductive spectrum with opposite poles being tournament species, in which males compete fiercely for reproductive privileges with females, and pair bond arrangements, in which a male and female will bond for life.^[4] According to Sapolsky, humans are somewhat in the middle of this spectrum, in the sense that humans form pair bonds, but there is the possibility of cheating or changing partners.^[4] 

These species-particular behavior patterns provide a context for aspects of human reproduction, including dating. However, one particularity of the human species is that pair bonds are often formed without necessarily having the intention of reproduction. In modern times, emphasis on the institution of marriage, traditionally described as a male-female bond, has obscured pair bonds formed by same-sex and transgender couples, and that many heterosexual couples also bond for life without offspring, or that often pairs that do have offspring separate. Thus, the concept of marriage is changing widely in many countries.

Historically, marriages in most societies were arranged by parents and older relatives with the goal not being love but legacy and "economic stability and political alliances", according to anthropologists.^[5] 

Accordingly, there was little need for a temporary trial period such as dating before a permanent community-recognized union was formed between a man and a woman. While pair-bonds of varying forms were recognized by most societies as acceptable social arrangements, marriage was reserved for heterosexual pairings and had a transactional nature, where wives were in many cases a form of property being exchanged between father and husband, and who would have to serve the function of reproduction. 

Communities exerted pressure on people to form pair-bonds in places such as Europe; in China, society "demanded people get married before having a sexual relationship"^[6] and many societies found that some formally recognized bond between a man and a woman was the best way of rearing and educating children as well as helping to avoid conflicts and misunderstandings regarding competition for mates.

From https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dating

Generally, during much of recorded history of humans in civilization, and into the Middle Ages in Europe, weddings were seen as business arrangements between families, while romance was something that happened outside of marriage discreetly, such as covert meetings.^[7] The 12th-century book The Art of Courtly Love advised that "True love can have no place between husband and wife."^[7] According to one view, clandestine meetings between men and women, generally outside of marriage or before marriage, were the precursors to today's dating.^[7]